Beauty in Autumn Read online

  "No," he rasps. "Open for me."

  My breath catches in my throat and I force myself to do as he commands, to part my thighs and give him access to my most secret parts. His big hand cups my pussy, scorchingly hot. I moan, unable to remain quiet. It's the most intimate thing I've ever felt, and it makes me feel excited and squirmy both at once.

  "Your cunt is so wet."

  His blunt words make me gasp, and when he rubs a finger along the seam of my folds, I moan again. "Is that bad?" He sounds surprised, and I wonder if it's something that's not done, getting all slick and hot when you're turned on. I've never given it much thought; it's something that's always happened when I got aroused.

  "No. It's very, very good," Ruari whispers. "I like it."

  "I like your touch," I tell him, and then moan again when one of his big, blunt fingers strokes over my clit. "Just like that!"

  "Tell me how you want it," he commands. I feel a big hand land on my belly, his other between my thighs. It's like he's holding me down so he can touch me, and it's the most arousing thing ever. I can't stop moaning or moving underneath his grip. I want to raise my hips up, to put more friction against the gentle strokes he's giving my pussy but he's holding me in place.

  I pant, my hands going to my breasts so I can pluck at my nipples while he toys with my folds. "Rub me again," I demand of him. "Go in little circles around my clit. Soft touches."

  "Like this?" He drags the pad of one finger over my clit and I nearly come off the bed. I cry out, my body jolting with a surge of intense pleasure, and the hand on my belly reaches up and grabs a fistful of my hair, anchoring me down. "I've got you, pretty Willow," he murmurs close to my ear, the beast-like growl in his throat making his words that much more erotic. "Are you going to come all over my fingers? Soak my hand with your juices?" He continues to tell me all sorts of filthy things as he rubs me just as I've demanded, until I'm sobbing my need and I splinter apart in his arms.

  As I come, I feel him lean down and his forehead presses against mine, against the blindfold.

  Panting with my release, I reach up and touch his hair. It's soft and thick, tangled and long enough to brush his shoulders. "Are you all right?" I murmur.

  "I...just need a moment," he tells me. He lifts his head and steps away. Ruari inhales deeply and then groans. There's a faint sound of licking. "Your taste is incredible."

  I squirm with pleasure and embarrassment both as I hear that. He's tasting me? "What does it taste like?"

  "The sweetest thing ever."

  I bite my lip, wishing I could see it. Damn, I hate this stupid blindfold. I want to see everything and all I get are sounds. It's so unfair. "Did you come?" I ask, curious. Maybe he did and I didn't realize it because I didn't feel it hit my arm this time.

  He's silent, and I take that as a no.

  "Can...can I touch you?" I ask, all breathless at the thought.

  "You want to touch me?"

  "Of course." My answer sounds a little too pat, even for my own ears, so I add, "I'd love to. If you don't mind, that is."

  He laughs, that same broken, raspy laugh that sounds like it's coming from too many teeth. "As if I would turn away the touch of a lovely woman?"

  "Well, you might," I say meekly. "But I'd be disappointed if you did."

  "You can touch me, but I cannot guarantee you will like it." He hesitates for a long moment and grabs my hand when I reach out. "I am...a beast in all ways."

  I shake my head. "You're just a man to me," I tell him. And I slowly reach forward and put a hand on his chest. I'm not entirely surprised to find it bare - maybe beasts don't wear a lot of clothing - nor am I surprised to find that his chest is hard and smooth and muscular, with just a hint of chest hair. It doesn't feel beastly at all.

  I can feel just how tense he is under my touch, though. He truly expects me to reject him, and my heart breaks for Ruari. I move to the edge of the bed, putting both of my hands on his chest. "I see nothing wrong with the way you feel," I say softly. "You feel warm and strong to me." I trail a hand down one muscular arm. Maybe this is part of his curse - maybe he looks beastly on the outside but feels human. Maybe he doesn't even realize this himself.

  Or maybe it's the blindfold that allows me to see what's truly here instead of the curse? Who can say.

  All I know is that it's incredibly pleasurable to touch him, and I want to explore all of his body. "Ruari," I whisper. "I'm glad I'm here with you." It seems like we're in this together, and I feel incredibly bonded to him right now. We're drawn together in this curse, and in our mutual pleasure. It's fascinating and it makes me hungry for more and more.

  Three days won't be enough to explore all of this.

  But since it's what I've got, that's why I'm moving so fast. Maybe the Willow that has lived, sheltered and lonely on her parents' farm at the edge of Windybrook wouldn't be hungry for a stranger's body. Maybe that Willow would be too shy to blatantly grab at his arms and squeeze the hard muscles, or to run her fingers down his abdomen, learning his body by touch. That Willow might never cup his sac to feel its gentle weight, or skim her fingers along the long, veined length of his cock. The Willow of the curse, however, will take everything she can grab with both her hands, and more. She's going to get all of her living in if three days is all she has.

  Ruari's breath hitches when I touch his cock. He doesn't move as I learn his length with my hands, or when I discover the drops of wetness at the tip and bring them to my mouth to taste them. It's a strong flavor, but not an unpleasant one. "Ruari," I whisper again, because I like to hear his name on my lips...and I love the shuddering response it brings.

  "I want to see your face, Willow. All of it. I want you to see me."

  And to my horror, I feel him reach for the blindfold.

  I shriek, flinging myself backward. The blindfold fabric has worked its way into my hair and snarls on several strands of my hair, hanging barely over my eyes. I squeeze them tightly shut and curl myself into a protective ball, shielding my face. "Don't! You can't do that!"

  The beast snarls. "Why? Tell me why!"

  I can't. "I won't!"

  "Do you mock me, Willow? Is that what this is? Some game of yours?" His rage is terrible to hear. "Shall I rip it off your face and end this charade for myself?"

  "Do that, and you lose me forever," I whisper. You lose everything.

  "I only have you for one more day anyhow," he says, and his voice is so, so bitter. "What does it matter?"

  "It matters to me." And because I can't trust him, I pull the covers back over my entire body, ducking my head underneath like a child, until none of me is visible to him. "Leave me, please. Don't come back. I can't trust you."

  Ruari gives another beastlike snarl of rage, and then I hear him storm out of my room, claws clicking on the stone floor.

  5

  WILLOW

  The next day passes much like the last, but I'm conscious now, more than ever, that time is slipping away. The autumn weather - brisk and crisp with the high wind - has turned bitterly cold. I open my window and wrap myself in a blanket to stay near it, but it's not comfortable. The day passes endlessly slow, and I can't help but think about every hour that slips away. Every minute.

  Ruari does not come by.

  It isn't until I climb into my bed again and adjust my double-blindfolds that I wonder if he's coming to see me at all. Has he given up on me?

  Did he think that when I asked him to leave, I meant forever?

  Did he think I'd given up entirely?

  He'd ruined the moment, but I've not given up on him. I still want to break this curse. I still want him.

  I rack my brain, trying to think of any hidden messages in Leta's instructions. Is there something I missed? But her instructions were simple, and if I follow them, at the end of the three days, the curse will be broken.

  Don't look upon anything that's part of his curse.

  Don't tell him why.

  Don't let him spill his seed inside me. />
  The last part still makes me blush, of course. Not that we'll ever get to him making love to me. This isn't going as I'd hoped, especially not if he continues to leave me alone over and over again. He's offended by my blindfold, but I can't remove it. And because I'm blindfolded, I can't go after him.

  What to do?

  "Ruari?" I call out. There's no answer, not even when I touch myself and call his name a few more times. He's not here. Frustrated, I slip on my night-dress and fumble for a pair of shoes.

  If he's abandons me, I worry it'll affect the curse. I worry we need to spend this night together. Somehow I don't think Leta pictured us spending so much time apart when she advised me, but what can I do? I'm only one person and dozens - maybe hundreds - have failed before me. Maybe this is doomed after all.

  But if it is, then why not enjoy one last night in the world? Why spend it alone and lonely? Unloved?

  That decides me. If Leta's wrong - or if I fail - then I might as well go out in the arms of another, experiencing all that I can of love before fate catches up with me. I slide off the edge of the bed and put my hands out, feeling for the wall. I encounter it, and continue to feel my way along until I find the door. I open it and step through, keeping the thick stone against one hand as I do. I find a few more doors as I go, but as I open each one and call out Ruari's name, there's no response. I continue on, determined to find him.

  I...hope it's a small castle.

  As I continue down the hall, I lose my footing. I step forward and the floor just isn't there. Too late, I realize I've found stairs and pitch forward--

  Only to be caught by a pair of strong arms. I give a little cry of surprise and cling to Ruari's shoulders. "You caught me!"

  "What are you doing, wandering around blind?" His voice is a furious growl, and the hands that hold me are tight. He gives me a little shake as if he wants to rattle my head, but doesn't put me down. "I'm taking you back to your rooms."

  "What? No!" I cling to his neck, as if that will solve everything. "I came looking for you!"

  He snarls. "Why?"

  "Because you didn't come to see me," I say softly. "If this is our last night together, why are we going to spend it apart?"

  Ruari hesitates. "You told me to leave you alone."

  "I was frightened last night. You broke my trust and I couldn't expect you to not pull off my blindfold. It's very important to me that it stays on until the morning." I press my nose against his throat. He smells warm and slightly sweaty, but human. I love the smell of him, I decide. Sometimes I think the 'beast' thing is all in his head, but if it wasn't for touching him, I'd think he was a beast. He sounds like one when he walks, and when he talks. It's all very confusing.

  "Until the morning," he repeats slowly. "But in the morning..."

  "I know," I say softly. I might be another one of the doomed roses in the morning. "But if this is to be my last night, I'd like to spend it with you. But...I can't if you try to remove my blindfold again. Can you promise me that you won't try to pull it off?"

  "It means that much to you?"

  I wish I could tell him how important it is. "It does. It has to stay on." I reach out with one hand to find his face, and cup his cheek. "But that doesn't mean that anything else has to stay on." I'm being so bold, but what have I got to lose at this point?

  He groans and presses his face against my shoulder, hugging me against him. "I wish I could kiss you, Willow."

  "You can't?" I reach up and try to touch his mouth, but he pushes my hand away.

  "Don't." He grips my fingers in his. "It's the worst part of the curse. I...I don't want you to see me like that."

  He means with my hands. Oh. I nod, understanding what it's like to feel uncomfortable and vulnerable to another. "I won't touch your face and you won't touch my mask. Is anything else off limits?"

  "No." His voice sounds raspy, and it makes me excited to imagine his breath quickening like mine is.

  "Then...can we spend tonight together?" I take his hand and pull it to my breast. "I'd like the company."

  In response, he picks me up again in his arms. Ruari walks fast, his claws clicking on the stone floors.

  "Where are you taking me?" I ask, caressing his arm. I want to touch him all over, to explore him like I've been dying to do. I hope he's not abandoning me.

  "To my bed," he growls out. "You're not leaving it until I'm done with you."

  Oh, I like that thought. I like that thought very much. I lie quietly in his arms as he carries me through the castle, and it doesn't seem like we've gone very far before he opens a door and pushes us through it. I'm curious as to what his room is like, and when he sets me down gently on the edge of a bed, I reach out and touch the bed to explore it. Curiously, the blankets are messed up and the bed feels very much like the one I just left. "Is...is this my bed? Did you take me back to my room?"

  A horrible thought occurs to me. Did he just change his mind? So quickly?

  "Not your bed," Ruari says in a gruff voice. "You've always been in mine."

  I blush at the thought. "Have I truly? Do you...do you move all the women that come here into your room?" I suddenly find myself wondering if he's been in love with any of the others. Does he still mourn their loss?

  "You are the first to be in my bed. In fact, you are the first that has ever touched me." He strokes my cheek and I lean into the caress automatically. "You are the first of many, many things."

  And the last, I find myself hoping. "That makes me happy."

  "And me? Do I make you happy?"

  I reach out and run a hand down his chest. He feels broad and muscular, with just a hint of chest hair that crisps under my fingers. There's nothing beastly about him in the slightest. Not as far as I can tell. "You do...until you leave me alone all day. It's very quiet and lonely without you here, you know."

  "It's very quiet and lonely here always," he says, voice sad. "The days that someone arrives are the worst."

  "Because you know they're going to leave?" I ache for him.

  "Because I know they will be horrified and repulsed by what I am. I know that I am destroying their lives with my curse, and I can do nothing to help them."

  Ruari's response makes me feel so very sad. How lonely he must feel. "And then they disappear again after three days, adding to your guilt."

  He touches my cheek. "I would prefer that no one come at all, just so I can spare their lives. But if they do not, the curse is never-ending. And in the end, I am given no choice."

  His touch is gentle and pleasant, and I lean into it, caressing his hand as he cups my face. "And have you ever fallen in love with one of them?"

  "Never. None have looked at me with anything but sheer disgust. It is hard to love when you are repulsed." His other hand goes to my hair, touches my dark locks. "Is that why you are so determined to wear your blindfold, Willow? So you cannot look at me and be disgusted?"

  "That's not it." Somehow I think if I saw his face, I wouldn't be disgusted anyhow. I'd only be saddened by the fact that he's been so cruelly cursed. "I'm honoring a promise to another, nothing more."

  "It must be a very important promise."

  I nod, not trusting myself not to spill the details. I can't talk about this. "Thank you for understanding."

  "Oh, I do not understand." His chuckle is harsh. "But I am greedy. I want to touch you more than anything." His fingers stroke down my arm. "And I want to spend this last night knowing what it is like to feel pleasure. I am a greedy beast."

  "Don't call yourself that," I admonish him. I put a hand to his waist and find that he's wearing pants of some kind, though the fabric feels worn and old. "You're just Ruari to me. Never a beast."

  "If you could see what you were touching..."

  "I would still see Ruari," I whisper to him. My fingers find the laces of his pants and I tug at them, loosening things until the fabric falls away. There's nothing but smooth skin and I reach lower, looking to continue where I left off last night. I can't wai
t to explore him all over, to see what happens when I touch him like he touched me. The thought's exciting and I'm practically squirming with eagerness. "Can I touch you as I please? Or are you still nervous that I'll be repulsed?"

  "You...can touch me." He strokes my cheek again. "I am yours."

  His words fill me with yearning and excitement both. I decide I'm going to take my time. Since I cannot see, I must rely on my fingers to 'describe' Ruari to my hungry senses. I start with his hair, thick and wavy under my fingers. It's tousled and overlong, as if he hasn't taken care of himself since becoming cursed. I slide my hands down to his ears, touching them briefly before moving on to his face. I trace his features, trying to picture them. His brows are thick and heavy, and his lashes are so long that they brush against my skin when I trace around his eyes. His nose is strong with the slightest bump to it. His cheekbones feel high, and his jaw is square. I don't go near his mouth, since he doesn't like that, but I imagine I'd want to kiss it even if it was a thin, firm line. He's mine, this sad, lonely man. I want to kiss him everywhere to show that.

  But I don't. I just lick my lips and continue exploring. I move down to his shoulders, and they feel big and broad under my touch. I squeeze his biceps and then let my touch wander over his chest. He's firm everywhere here, not a hint of fat over lean muscle, and I can't help the sigh that escapes me at being able to touch him.

  "Tell me what you're thinking," he demands in a low voice.

  "Just that you're such a pleasure to touch," I tell him. "I could do this all day and all night. It makes me sad that you stayed away from me all day, because I could do this for hours." I give him a small smile. "You've robbed us both of pleasure."

  "I'll make it up to you," he vows, and his hand goes to my hair. He trails his fingers through it, and when he inhales deeply, I suspect he's sniffing it. "I'll make everything up to you, Willow. Tonight will be the best night you've ever had. I'll give you so much pleasure you'll beg me to stop."

  I press my thighs together at the thought, because I'm getting aroused just by touching him, and I haven't even hit the good parts yet. "And what if I tell you to never stop?"